I read with sadness the letter from the "man resentful of NFP" in the March-April issue. May God bless this long-suffering couple with the strength to overcome the very difficult obstacles they are facing in their marriage. 

One alarming thing about this situation is that, from the letter, it appears this couple has been using NFP to avoid pregnancies for 18 years — a self-described "endless...nightmare." When Pope Paul VI endorsed natural child spacing in the encyclical Humanae Vitae, he did so with stipulations:

    If... there are serious motives to space out births, which derive from the physical or psychological conditions of husband and wife, or from external conditions, the Church teaches that it is then licit to take into account the natural rhythms immanent in the generative functions... to regulate birth...

The phrase "serious motives" must be at the forefront of the decision of every married couple who chooses to use NFP to space their children. 

In his book Love and Responsibility, Karol Wojtyla (later our beloved Pope John Paul II) wrote,

    The natural method is permissible only with certain reservations... parents themselves must be careful, when they limit conception, not to harm their families...From the point of view of the family, periodic continence as a method of regulating conception is permissible in so far as it does not conflict with a sincere disposition to procreate.

Even NFP can be dangerous to a marriage when it is used with a contraceptive mentality. God did not design sexual intercourse to be relegated to Phase III for the entirety of a marriage. I urge any couple who finds themselves continuously avoiding procreation for an extended period of time to seriously consider their motives in light of the good of their marriage and their family.

And please let this kind man know that it is never too late to re-create a marriage, especially when he clearly has such a sincere and loving heart.