Reading the question about comments from friends or family after a miscarriage, I shed some tears. This always happens when I reflect for a few minutes on the several miscarriages I experienced, even though I was blessed with six pregnancies that came to term. The first suggestion I have is to remember that we should mourn our little ones and it is good to mourn. This is easier said than done since, as N.B. pointed out, others will try to give us reasons not to do so. Jesus had to remind us that those who mourn will be comforted, so it must be hard!

Secondly, since every mother will receive cruel or thoughtless remarks from friends and strangers, those who love life must reach out with unexpected remarks to both family and strangers that offer support and admiration about their children! I remember once at church a woman I scarcely knew commented on how beautifully neat and clean my little six-month-old fourth child always looked. I have never forgotten the kindness because at the time I sometimes felt that not all that needed to be done was getting accomplished … that she could compliment me on something so simple was a treasure!

Finally, now that my children are mostly grown up, we often receive compliments about them from some of the family members who were most skeptical of our large family years ago. I resist responding to them, "You kept complaining about us having babies; you could not see that we were having people! Delightful people!"

— M.S., IN